How much "should" a baby cry?

Welcome to your weekly dose of nervous system love!

Today’s share is inspired by another great question from a member of my online community:

Can you please elaborate on how much babies “should” cry? I understand there are differences between the Eastern world and Western world… I’m trying to manage my expectations. In a perfect environment, how much “should” a baby cry?

Watch my latest vlog (originally a livestream) for a little educational ramble on this topic.

Here are some of the key points I get into:

Why it’s so important for primary caregivers to be able to ATTUNE to babies’ needs (and what gets in the way of us being able to do this)
How babies respond to the physiology of their primary caregivers (aka: if you’re stressed or anxious or suppressing your anger, they can FEEL it – even when you don’t know it)
Why parenting “techniques” just don’t work (from a physiological perspective)
How it always comes back to biology and why animals don’t need parenting books
Some stories from my own experience and learning that help illustrate all of the above

TLDR? My husband and colleague, Seth Lyon, summarized it very well in our recent Parenting Masterclass on July 3 (you can download the replay of this FREE class here, if you missed it):

“Babies don’t cry because they’re emotionally upset. Babies cry because they have a physiological need that needs to be met.”

(And a parent or caregiver’s ability to understand and respond appropriately to a baby’s needs depends on the level of capacity and regulation that they have in their OWN nervous system.)

Watch ‘How much “should” a baby cry?’ to learn more >

If you are a parent or caregiver to an older child or children, and you are only just finding out about this nervous system “stuff” now and realizing all the things you might have done wrong when they were babies, this SmartBody SmartMind™ (SBSM) alum has a message of hope for you: